Fun with Jane & Dick

The Lexus is in need of new tires but I’m being frugal and don’t want to buy brand new tires for a car I don’t plan to keep. Dick then remembers the place he would go to for tires back when I was in college….Reasonable Ron’s. I’ve only been there once and that was 13 years ago. Ron’s is on the “other” side of town and Dick described it as a dive and being run by a pack of “biker dudes”.

I guess people who live in my neighborhood hardly ever, well NEVER, venture out to this side of downtown but after living in a city like Detroit, I’m fearless. Ron’s has been around for over 20 years and looks like it used to be an old gas station that’s never been updated. When I get there, just as Dick said, there were five “biker-looking” guys chillin’ out front, ho-hum waiting patiently for the next customer to arrive…which happens to be yours truly. “What the fuck?” would be the best way I could describe the look on their faces as I’m pulling in with my Lexus. 

 

 

I guess it could be a little intimidating being in this environment if you’re not used to being around shop guys or Harley guys but I’ve worked in car plants, and used to shoot pool on quarter tables at the local honkey-tonk dive bar with my Harley-toting friends after work. There was this one short-stocky line worker that fit the Harley-Biker mold perfectly…black raggety t-shirt, long hair tied back in a ponytail, bandana rolled and tied around the head, rough goti beard, etc. A group of us were at the bar one day and he shows off his Harley to me. It was a two-seater and he asks me if I want to go for a ride. Why not? Then he says, “Oh, you’re gonna like this!”…He then flips this switch and the seat starts to gyrate and vibrate. He says, “My ole lady really digs it!”. And I’m like, “Ummm…for real? Good for you Ben!”. I mean the dang thing is a Harley! It vibrates anyway!

 

Being an engineer, I’m not supposed to fraternize with the UAW workers but I would rather hang with  those guys than a stuffy, big-headed, boring Engineer any day! It would not be surprising for my boss or the plant manager to see me taking a smoke break with the line guys…a grave faux-pas for a female Engineer like me but do you think I gave a shit? This is probably why I could never climb the corporate ladder. I can’t keep my honest thoughts to myself and be the ass-kissing “yes-woman” they’re looking for. My eat-shit-and-die looks and rolling of the eyes are enough to get my ass fired. That and I notoriously fell asleep in meetings, once even in a meeting with the CEO of Saturn. Ooops.

So, I’m not worried cause I know good people come in all shapes, colors, sizes, statuses, professions, educational levels, etc. etc. etc. I’m a lover not a judger. I even bring my girls, Thelma and Louise, with me and they have fallen asleep in the car on the way here. Plus, I want cheap tires that still have tread on them and this is THE place to go.

 

 

The guys are super-nice and I tell them I need four tires and it’s like they’re off to the races. I felt like that hot female racecar driver, Danika Patrick,  with my own personal pit crew for my race car. All of them immediately began to jack up the car with these hand-pumped jacks (I don’t know what the proper name is). I’m still sitting my Lexus and it feels like being on that fake roller-coaster ride at Chucky Cheese. The kids are shaken awake. I decide that I could not pass up this opportunity to take pics of the guys working on my car and ask them if they would mind. The nice gentlemen stopped and kindly assisted me down from my car so that I could get these shots:

Click HERE to see the unedited, raw version of this picture.

 

 

 

 

I was told that everyone and their mother come from near and far to get one of these HAWT T-shirts. Perfect Harley-Biker attire. Maybe I need to get one to sleep in.

 

Ten minutes, four tires, and $104 bucks later I have some reasonable tires that will do for now. 

 

“Thank you and sorry it took so long”, was the response I got from the guys. Thanks guys! I’ll be back!

Right after I changed the tires, I called Dick (Because he’s in Cali) to tell him. He asked me a billion questions like, “Did you make sure all 4 tires are the same brand? Did they balance the tires? Did you haggle them down on the price?” I’m like, “Why didn’t you tell me all this BEFORE I went over there? I don’t know to look for these things?” I’m annoyed because I’m doing all the work he’s supposed to be doing if he weren’t in California.

 

Nonetheless, I sold the Lexus in the next few days…I think mostly in part to the good “chi” these guys put into the tires. Awwww yeah!

 

-Jane, Happy Tire Customer

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