Dick and I play ping pong alot thanks to a table we got for Christmas from Lucy Lu. We love it and play any chance we get! As you may know, I really want to add competitive ping pong champion to my resume.
Usually, we play in the middle of the night, with my jammin’ music and occasionally, some red wine. It’s a fast-paced game that requires fast reflexes and surprisingly, makes you sweat.
I pretty much lose every time to Dick (I hate admitting this.) but it never keeps me from trying because I’m SUPER competitive. Don’t get me wrong, I do win sometimes and many times it’s close but he almost always ends up winning. From the sounds of it, I seem like a sucky, loser ping pong player but actually, I’m better than your average player and I can probably beat most college guys that THINK they can play because they were champion of their dorm.
It just happens that Dick is EXCEPTIONALLY good. We played at a local bar one night and had a couple of guys were trying to hustle us. Instead, they got their asses beat by my husband (I beat one of them too. lol) but they end up trying to recruit him to hustle as well. At least I know he has something to fall back on if none of the stuff we’re doing now works. Ha!
Well, on this evening of ping pong, I’m losing and making excuses left and right. I do this purposefully to be funny and to make him laugh…wink wink. No really. I do.
So here I am…
“I wasn’t ready! Do over.”
“What’s the score? You didn’t say the score! Do over.”
“I was scratching my ear, didn’t you see me? Do over.”
Finally he says…
“So how is this my problem? This is a competition! You have to be ready.”
Then he pretends that he’s picking his nose with the one hand and butt with the other, at the same time, while I’m getting ready to serve.
“Wait baby. I’m not ready.”
We’re in hysterics laughing now. Yes, I can laugh at myself.
-Jane, Excuse-makin’, Wannabe Ping Pong Champion
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