You may have noticed I have this mole above my lip. It’s been there since I was a child, only, it wasn’t always so prominent. It’s grown over the years. It used to be flat and now it’s poofy and has some dimension to it. Dick and Lucy Lu continuously make fun of me, telling me it’s going to take over my face one day. They’re making me paranoid and so I am prepared to have plastic surgery if my mole gets out of hand. It will be the one time I will consider plastic surgery.

Growing up, my mom would tell me that in Vietnamese culture these moles are a sign of greed (“tham an”). A greedy mole. Anyone sporting one of these babies has a greedy nature to them. Hmmm…time to self evaluate. Ok, yes, I love food and tend to hoard it. Crap!

I wonder if these iconic figures who are famous for their beauty mark are greedy too? Marilyn Monroe, Prince, Cindy Crawford and although fake…Madonna.

My dear Thelma is starting to get one on the side of her mouth as well. Mine used to look just like hers…small, faint and one-dimensional. It’s taken 30+ years to get to it’s now 3-dimensional size but I’m still worried I’m going to look like one of those old hags with a big mole with hair coming out of it, scaring the little kids who will taunt me as the witchy old hag with the ugly, large mole on her face.

I know for a fact that my sweet thing is COMPLETELY GIVING and so, this disproves any credence to the Vietnamese superstition of greed. We’re going to have to side with the Western opinion on this one… BEAUTY MARK!

-Jane, Beauty Mark not Greedy Mole-Possessing Vietnamese Woman